1/2/11

It started as a good day, but I had an unexpected visit from my oldest son and things did not go well. Let's put it this way I ended in tears. He doesn't appreciate anything I do for him even if it is just a small thing. I'm helping him indirectly by taking care of his daughters in the morning. Everything revolves around him and since I don't have a paying job my life can be altered at a moments notice. Another thing I can't do is release my frustrations because I don't really have a friend I can unload too. My sisters and brother have probably had enough of me and I can't tell my parents because it would upset them too much. I really need to do some research and write so that I can try to make some money. I need to stop paying for lessons in piano because I really don't see a future in that. It has been fun but I really need to focus. I did write and I will continue tomorrow.